20 October 2005

Party time

It has been rather quiet at the Kwik-E-Mart today. Homer is in Guatemala, and Snake is in jail for the next few days, so there has not been much to do. To avoid boredom, I have been playing a lot of high energy dance music in the store. I decided to make a list:

Apu's Favorite High Energy Dance Songs that End with Explosions

1. Rang De (from Thakshak)
2. Dhoom Machale (from Dhoom)
3. La Copa de la Vida (by Ricky Martin)
4. Taal Se Taal Mila (Dance Remix) (from Taal)
5. Ishq Kamina (from Shakti)
6. Tunak Tunak Tun (by Daler Mehndi)

As the music fans among you have no doubt gathered, I have listed the songs in ascending order, based on the quality of the explosion at the end. Perhaps my readers would be so kind as to suggest other energetic dance songs that end with impressive musical explosions.

12 October 2005


Manjula and I have been enjoying the television show Lost. There is an Indian actor on the show named Naveen Andrews, but he doesn't play an Indian person, he plays an Iraqi soldier. Manjula won't admit it, but I think she finds him quite handsome. Normally I don't mind, because there is also a very lovely Korean woman on the show. But tonight as I was tenderly embracing Manjula the way I normally do on Wednesday evenings before my graveyard shift, I noticed a far away look in her eyes. I think she may have been pretending that I was this Naveen fellow. Later when she told me that she thought perhaps I should grow my hair a bit longer and wash it only once a week, I became even more suspicious.

26 September 2005

My new hat

Since the weather is getting colder, Manjula decided to knit a hat for me.

Manjula told me that she was going to count to three and then take a picture of the hat, but as she was counting, I noticed that my son Anoop was vomiting on our new Oriental rug. That is why I am making such an idiotic expression in the photo.

16 September 2005

Graveyard shift at the Kwik-E-Mart

Penguin baseball!

22 August 2005

All's well that ends well.

For those of you that are wondering (is anyone actually reading this?), Sanjay and I worked everything out. He did some research on the online poker playing industry and realized that it was quite a competitive arena, so for now, he is staying at the Kwik-E-Mart. I told him that he is right to be proud of his daughter's academic achievements, then we had some chai Squishies to celebrate our reconciliation.

Did anyone see the series finale of Six Feet Under last night? That montage at the end was quite good, I thought.

20 August 2005

An argument

I had a bit of an argument with my brother Sanjay last night. Sanjay wants to sell his share of the Kwik-E-Mart and start an online poker playing website. I asked him not to quit, and told him that there is no one else in Springfield capable of running the Kwik-E-Mart. Sanjay suggested the teenaged fellow with all the pimples, but he already has seven other jobs, so I don't think that will be a good idea.

The argument got a bit heated, and we both said some things that we probably shouldn't have said. Sanjay told me that my life in America has been a waste, and that the Kwik-E-Mart is no place for someone with a Ph.D in Computer Science and eight children to care for. I told Sanjay that he has become too greedy to care about his family, and that no one wants to hear about how well his daughter did in the Johns Hopkins Talent Search.

We are both too stubborn to apologize, so I'm not sure what's going to happen.

09 August 2005

Why I hate dinner parties

I haven't had much time to blog, as things have been quite busy at the Kwik-E-Mart lately. Three of the children have started walking, so it has been a bit mad at home, too. Yesterday, Nabendu, Poonam, Uma, Pria, Sandeep, Sashi, and Gheet all needed to be changed at the same time. I think they are somehow coordinating their bowel movements in such a way as to make my life a living hell.

Sometimes it can be quite lonely being the only Indian family in Springfield. The Shelbyville Indian community isn't much better. They are all quite snobbish, and always having such awful dinner parties. On Saturday Manjula and I had to go to one of them. Two of the couples at the party were fighting, so it was quite uncomfortable. Apparently, Rashmi told her friend Meena that Vimla's new drapes were the cheapest ones sold at J.C. Penney's. Then Vimla heard about Rashmi's drape comments from Meena and told her husband Raj, who went to Rashmi's house and yelled at her husband Anand. Now Rashmi and Vimla and Raj and Anand aren't talking to each other, and no one is talking to Meena. Yet everyone still insists on getting together and pretending to be impressed when their clumsy children perform the "Bole Chudiyan" dance.

Meena invited Manjula over for dinner next Friday, but I think I would rather be shot by Snake again than have to listen to Meena and her tone-deaf husband sing "Khabhi Khabhi" one more time.